Why Your Post-Partum Body Should Be Celebrated

I wasn’t prepared for the response my post-partum body would receive after having my boys, and I’m afraid it’s something many new moms go through. Whether you had an easy or difficult pregnancy, your body went through some serious changes to grow, nurture, and deliver a baby.

How are we supposed to look after giving birth?

It's human nature to compare ourselves to others. When we look at our own postpartum bodies, it's impossible not to wonder, Am I doing enough for my body? Because I've given birth three times, I know that society has unrealistic expectations of what a postpartum body should look like and how quickly it should return to its pre-baby shape. But I'm here to tell you: your body is beautiful after giving birth. If anything, it should be celebrated! Within this article are some things to keep in mind if you're struggling with negativity around your postpartum body. And don't forget, ladies—all pregnant women are real women; all new moms are real moms; all postpartum bodies deserve love.

*An important note before reading on: as much as possible, phrases like postpartum, pregnant and lactating will be used instead of more stigmatizing terms (eg., in recovery, prego or breastfeeding) whenever speaking about situations related to childbearing/rearing.

The Rise of Real Bodies Online

For generations, we’ve been used to seeing photographs of impossibly beautiful models and celebrities. These images have long been considered the norm for what beauty is supposed to look like—and even though that may not be true anymore, it seems as if many of us haven’t caught up yet. But where do these unrealistic expectations come from? They come from people like you and me. We are the ones who decide which photos go viral or who get millions of followers on Instagram or Facebook. We make these images famous by making them popular because they’re appealing to our senses in some way, but they aren’t always realistic representations of what beauty really looks like. Now more than ever before, we’re starting to see more real bodies online. And that isn’t just a result of body positive movements; it has something to do with new technology too. Nowadays, anyone can create content and put it online for free. There’s no need to shell out thousands of dollars for marketing when anyone can simply make a video on their phone or post a picture with their camera. It makes things easier for everyone: You don’t need expensive equipment to share your voice. So why wouldn’t women and men around the world take advantage of that? Why wouldn’t we share our own stories and experiences with one another through new media technologies? That is precisely what happened over recent years, leading to an increase in real bodies (and real experiences) being shared online.

What’s Wrong With the Word Mom Bod?

Women’s bodies change a lot when they have kids. And no, that doesn’t mean it has to be a bad thing. In fact, mom bod is a beautiful thing. It’s an embodiment of all that power and potential, showing just how strong women are and what our bodies can do for us and for others. So let’s celebrate mom bods—in all their glorious shapes and sizes—instead of criticizing them or trying to hide them in shame. Your post-partum body should not be condemned. Instead, it should be celebrated! Here’s why:

With pregnancy comes weight gain and changes to your body. For example, a woman’s uterus expands from an average size of 2–3 inches wide (when not pregnant) to almost 10 inches while pregnant! There is also a lot of stretching as it grows larger to make room for baby. As you give birth, there is even more stretching to allow room for baby’s head and shoulders during delivery. You may experience hemorrhoids or loose skin, breasts that leak milk or look different than they used to. Don’t let all these things scare you; in fact, celebrate them! You did all of that for someone else. Now tell me what could be more powerful than that? Embrace what your body has done; we need more women doing so instead of hiding behind sweatpants and baggy clothing in order to avoid being judged by others.

Stop Hating on My Mom Bod, Please!

I love my body. It has done amazing things, and it will continue to do so. I appreciate every inch of skin that carries me through life, my stretch marks and scars. But despite all of my 'flaws', I still embrace my body because it's mine and there is nothing wrong with it or anything that makes it less than perfect. Let's be honest, once we have our babies we are never going to look like we did before they came along. So celebrate us and stop hating on us mommies! Stop putting pressure on us to get into shape immediately after we give birth, take your time and let yourself heal. Allow yourself to be real and human again instead of just trying to fit back into some pre-pregnancy jeans that you wore 8 months ago when you knew your baby wasn't going anywhere for quite some time. We need to stop putting women down and start lifting each other up. We need to learn how to support one another even if we don't agree with someone else's choices, especially when those choices pertain directly to their bodies which should be considered sacred ground among women. If you're not being supportive then why would someone ever confide in you? Support one another in finding ways to make ourselves happy, not just looking a certain way but actually feeling good about ourselves as well.

Some Tips for Feeling Better in Your Skin After Having Kids

My postpartum body is not my mother’s. It has stretch marks, a tummy that still isn’t quite as flat as it was before pregnancy. I don’t care if some random person on social media thinks there is something wrong with my tummy after having kids – they aren’t living in it. These bodies have done amazing things, so why are we being shamed for how they look? Why do we feel like less of a woman because our belly never looks exactly like it did before we had children? That word – perfect – seems to be getting thrown around more and more frequently when women talk about their bodies. There is no such thing as a perfect body. But there IS such thing as celebrating your real one! A woman with stretch marks and a postpartum belly isn’t less than – she just has a body that has done amazing things. I hope we can all embrace our postpartum bodies and stop feeling like we need to look perfect! The best way to do that is to celebrate real bodies: our own and those around us.

Tell me in comments: What have you learned from your post partum body?

Share your mommy-body-love resolution.